Attribution of Love

 

During the flame princess break up arc, Finn keeps switching up how he explains what happened, and that shift in explanation is what drives his emotions and motivation. Whenever het tells himself I handled that badly. He is thinking it was me but it was my behavior in the moment that put her off and I can change that. He sees the attribution as internal, controllable, and unstable. that kind of thinking is likely to create guilt instead of shame, and guilt is more motivating. Because he believes he can fix it he tries to apologize, being very honest and explain how he can do better next time. This works for a time but when they eventually break up again he goes back to the drawing board. He now thinks that he is to immature I mean come on she is a princess and he is just a guy. Whenever he is thinking this he is attributing his failure to internal, uncontrollable, and stable factors because he believes it is who he is and it is not going to change. When he sees it like this it causes him to feel shame and pull away he now sees the relationship as something that cant be fixed so he doesn't try.